February Numbers & Bike Night

Sometimes It Is Hard To Be A Woman   Giving All Your Love To Just One Man    You'll Have Bad Times    And He'll Have Good Times      Doing Things That You Don't Understand     But If You Love Him     You'll Forgive Him    Even Though He Is Hard To Understand    And If You Love Him    Oh Be Proud Of Him    Because After All   He's Just A Man   Stand By Your Man    Give Him Two Arms To Cling To    And Something Warm To Come To     When Nights Are Cold And Lonely    Stand By Your Man 

Tammy Wynette

Stand by Your Man 1968 

NUMBERS:

Registry from an exciting February. Somewhat   

26 hours

255 miles / 410km

1 PR

About the only aspect from these stats that I can be proud of is that I was on a bike everyday but two days in February. Thats right , a 28 day month and I rode some sort of a bike for 26 of those 28 days. Stylin' 

BANDS:

Today , I share with you all that I have observed this Winter. Stereotypes 

I auditioned with three separate "bands" over the Winter and I quickly discovered that lead guitar players are alcoholics. Not all but damn. They also carry a brilliant trait of an ability to talk from both sides of their mouth. Meaning , they say one thing but within an hour they protrude a full 180 from what they boasted earlier. And the biggest red flag that seems to be the common denominator is that all these band "leaders" lack the ability to follow through. Weird 

A dear friend of mine gave me a promising referral and I was under the impression that I was auditioning with a sober , well mannered group of older gents. Well , they were old alright. These guys are happy to camp out on BUSH Light "beer" and ONLY play 70's rock. Our first meeting , not realizing exactly or grasping the whole picture with this first take , these boys mention all the "venues" they can't play at , raw deals with former bandmates , and other ridiculous high school like stories between every song. Never once did they paint a scene of possibilities. Second session showed promise , silly me. We played an acoustic set and the drummer was fantastic. The idea that this band leader presented was reviving the MTV Unplugged Acoustic Sets and I was totally hooked for sure. See That Butt Below 

Our third "practice" went like this. As I drove up , the leader was in the process of crushing an empty Bush Beer can. This means that he is on at least his second before we played a note , opens AND knocks over his full beer , and after gathering himself and his electric guitar and says dreadfully," Let's play Twilight Zone by Golden Earring." I should have departed right then and there as a warm up song with 16th notes is beyond lame. Of course , while we are playing , he stops and says to me ," You are not playing it like the record. We are a cover band and we need to sound like the record." He was obviously pissed and I am pretty sure that he was upset with me before I even arrived. Who Knows. The three of us agree to play the song LOW by Cracker and after that song he says to me ," You haven't ever listened to Twilight Zone have you?" We just played LOW but he is clearly festering on the previous song or who Phuc N knows. He tells us that he is NOT interested in learning songs and these practices are only for tightening up. As he rambles on , I turned off the amp , unplugged my cord , and walked over to my gig bag. " I am not trying to be a dick but you should learn like 5 or 6 of these songs and come back and play with us." he says with that goofy tipsy swagger. I pleasantly looked past him and made eye contact with the drummer. " Wasn't my intention to waste your time today." and then stared right at the lead guitar player. Gathered my belongings and walked on out. Chump  

BIG SWIG:

This was a two year project that I haven't filled you in on in awhile. I never really felt compelled to share any of this but I have been questioned a lot. It used to be a bummer explaining it months ago when someone would ask me when we are playing again. My hope is that this imaginary monkey will lift off my shoulders if I elaborate my story here. If I think it out through black and white typed words. Maybe Yes , Maybe No. Allow me to process my thoughts and keep in mind that I am not and will never be the best musician ever. And for perspective , I know that bands don't need me to succeed. It's just that it used to bother me that Nathan and I don't play anymore. For those of you that are new here and do not know , I was playing Bass as a trio , we no longer speak. Fine With That 

Big Swig's inception was just the two of us and Nathan would be the first person that I ever played with. At that time , he was teaching me his originals. Well , he was teaching me all of it as I knew ZERO about song structure or progression or chords for that matter. We were enjoying our time together and playing very simple songs. Then , after about 6 months of that , we brought in a drunken lead guitar player. Early on , we tried to "put up" with the antics. Just as we entered the Summer season with booked gigs , Nathan asks me while we were standing in his driveway ," Do we fire John today or not?" Again , silly me , I explained to Nathan that we are three months booked out so let's make the best of it. All round this time , my tribe noticed the difference with the band's undertone , a big red flag waved after my tribe realized that Nathan and John no showed my birthday party. I knew Nate & John wouldn't attend because they were worried about a DUI and I definitely hadn't counted on them in months for anything. Their lack of sobriety is basically why we never booked gigs in Junction and just camped out in Palisade. That's my guess now that I am reflecting. But when your friends ask you what is up with your bandmates , kinda sucks having to cover for them. When your friends mention what's wrong with John when he bumbles his way through a show , gets old quick. When John asks Nate and I what day were are playing every time we practice , Sh*t gets real old. Repeating myself gets annoying fast. Nathan even hung a dry easer white board calendar with all the upcoming events and John would consistently ask about the next gig and dates and where is it again. Baby Sitting Adults Totally Blows A$$

Throughout last Summer , I never knew what to expect when I walked in for a practice session. John owns all the gear and somedays we had gear and other days we didn't. It wasn't like he would communicate or shoot us a text to bring our own gear. One July show , John was a royal dickhead and Nathan was pissed. Nathan wanted to Sh*t can his A$$ but Nathan was also concerned about all the PA equipment and the booked shows for August and September. Me personally , wish we had dumped John back in June and I shouldn't have talked Nate out of firing him back then. Nathan invited me over for drinks and talked about what to do with John. One thing that stood out to me was that Nathan felt we should keep John and his PA system until the end of September. I told Nathan look ," I made a mistake in my youth that was solely based on money. Don't make this decision because of the Ol Mighty Dollar Bill. Let's just cut John loose and move on. You and I can preform as a duo and maybe find another guitarist down the road." I even mentioned to Nathan how many times John stifled out creativity and how many times have you noticed him missing cues during our gigs. Now ,  and soon after that meeting , I realize that they are both amateurs and all along I was under the impression that I was the rookie of the group. So Lame

Something shifted shortly after that "band meeting" because those two defaulted into teenage mode after that. They both became unpredictable, they both would say sh*tty things , and they both lacked the ability to practice or play live without getting ripped before , during , and afterwards. They simply sucked the life out of the whole project. We were supposed to play for Nathan's birthday and they were both so hungover that day that they were nothing better that two lethargic middle school clowns. I socialized with the neighbors that came over but none of their "friends" came by. The whole vibe was depressing for sure and compared to Nate's previous birthday the year before , writing was on the wall. My plan was to chat up Nathan and gather a little clarification later that week. Both him and John were dodgy after that "party" for sure. Now I understand their plot as we were a few weeks before our last schedule gig. Oh Well

The final straw for me was Porchella. I was fired up and involved myself with all aspects of this event. Such as , hanging posters , calling the kitchen sink to spread the word , and meeting with the 6 board members regarding logistics , port-a-potties , conforming bands , etc. John made it clear that he wasn't about to lift a finger. I didn't add too much merit into it because that was just him all summer with his jackA$$ attitude. But about two weeks out , John informs us that he booked a Poker Run gig the same day as Porchella. Wrong , and of course he transformed into an immature little bitch and pouted all practice long. So again , John showed no interest in Porchella and lost the ability to track our own calendar of events. After his booking try , in a professional format , I sent the two of them an itinerary for the day of Porchella. Included was a packing up check list for the gig , lunch time , set up time , soundcheck time , tequila shots time , dress shirt change ,  performance schedule , setlist , breakdown , dinner that I was preparing for us and our "groupies", and the bike route downtown to catch the rest of the festival. John sends a snarky reply email  'that's too much information' as his way of trying to be funny I guess. The night before Porchella , during Bike Night that Nate and John NEVER attended once , he sends me a text at 9:30pm explaining how we need to set up in the driveway because standing on grass and playing sucks. If I presented an idea , totally closed minded. If they half cock a plan , oh , it is the greatest plan ever. Phuc U 

So of course John shows up in a t-shirt and maybe he was already drunk. He was in typical form of couldn't care less about anyone but himself. He made childish comments about any and all of it and I thought that Nathan was giving me the 'what a Phuc nut' look. Up until then I just assumed that Nathan and I were on the same page. But that was not the only reason that there was an elegiac theme to the event. When we actually played our set , we rocked the Sh*t out of it. We nailed all the mash up medley of tunes and The Dude lost count at 109 attendees and 11 dogs. In between songs I offer the audience trivia questions and rewarded them with Big Swig t-shirts and stickers. Unfortunately , after the show , John split and Nathan says to me," Well , we fulfilled our obligations." Not good job. Not showing any emotions of excitement. Not even a simple Thank You. Neither one of them were continuing on with the rest of the festival. Never Made Mention To My Floral Arrangements. Couldn't Careless About The Gnomes In Front Of Their Mic Stands. No Nothing. No Gratitude. No Karma. Nothing. Those two blew it and passing on mingling with friends that supported us all summer , friends that printed our Big Swig shirts , and friends who wanted to just chat and share a brew with us. But it was their useless MO over the past few months so I blew it off at the time and the rest of us enjoyed the sh*t out of the festival. On our bikes we rode , shared cocktails with friends , and caught up and visited with a number of folks that we hadn't seen in awhile. Here ( http://dumpingcrackbookblog.blogspot.com/2024/10/porchella-2024.html ) is that drama free post from the weekend. What I wasn't able to ever share with Nate and John is that we made $410.oo in tips!! What I never shared with them was our dear friends offered us $500 to play at their anniversary party in May. What they will never know , how many folks sot me out during the rest of Porchella to show appreciation , accolades , and pats on the back. Most of the Porchella performers were folk singers or singer song writers but NOBODY rocked it like we did. Until the very last band that were the mainliners. They blasted the volume and rocked the cover tunes for sure. After all, they were the "headliners" of Porchella. Way Cool 

 

So Friday after Porchella , Nathan sends me a text that reads ...

I do miss performing with these guys but I certainly don't miss the dynamics with childish personalities. Bands are chemistry based and totally looking forward to gelling with a new tribe. They are out there , just need to seek them out. I mean , there has to be light at the end of the tunnel , right?? I gotta believe that here are good humans everywhere. New Beginnings 

BIKE NIGHT:

Even though this article is piss poor and claims Friday Night Bike Night begins March 31st , We ride tomorrow night with the obvious St Patties Theme. Stoked !!!! 

And I just happen to be in the top banner photo during the theme Bubbles. I wrapped my self in LED Lights and then wrapped myself up with bubblewrap and I was glowing all night. And I made an appearance in the bottom two photos as well. Definitely surprised they printed the photo with me holding a well earned brew. I flipping love Friday Night Bike Night!! Sun , Rain , Wind , Snow , Or Theme , doesn't matter , I am all in and ready to play nice. Yahooooo0000000 

Stay Hip , 

Cheers